Brain Bust: Drabble series
by Mr Halfwright
Summary: Personality's clash when a hormonal Tails, egomaniacall Dr Eggman, mentally insane Dr Fukurokov and revengeful Wave are forced to work together in order to invent crazy inventions for G.U.N. under the not so watchful eyes of Team Dark! Course language.
1. So, What are you in for?

Brain Bust prologue: So, what are you in for?

Arighty folky's, this is my new story Brain Bust, pretty much I'm just writing this when I get bored of writing my current story Ark Fox, it's a drabble series that revolves around the main science guys of STH, more characters may be added later such as Dr Finitevus or Rotor, but for now it's just these guys. No OCs unless they have small rolls. The gun commander is called Commander Tower, cause according to one of the Comics that's his name apparently.

Ok the setting for this is an AU (Author Universe for those silly people out there.) but the guy's are on Mobius, mostly orientated around the Sonic Universe and STH Comics (think its archie, not sure) on that note, if any of yo fools wanna read allthe Sonic comics without downloading them, there's a guy on youtube called 'SonicComicWorld's' I would never normally advertise but if ya got time to kill go for it... after you read and review of course. For some magical mystical reason however there are earth influences here, so expect Tails to test out some 'Troll Physics'

This story won't be constantly updated, but you can expect the first few chapters to be released pretty quick, I will accept any ideas anyone has for the story dependent on quality of course, just PM me and I'll get back to ya pretty quick, that goes for any characters you want to see as long as they could fit into the plot (NO OCs **NO OCs!**)

In this, Tails and wave are both 16, Eggman and Fukurokov are oldish. Eggman is his normal take over the world self, Dr Fukurokov is the same, Wave just wants to escape, and Tails is one hormonal teenager.

This is a drabble series, but this one chapter will be longer than normal chapters.

Don't own any characters, herp a derp a derp.

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><p>"I can't believe it." Shadow huffed angrily as he walked down a G.U.N. hallway with the other teammates of team dark, Rouge the bat and E-123 Omega "I signed up with G.U.N. to blow stuff up... not babysit a bunch of homicidal scientists!"<p>

"Hey, this could be kinda fun Shadow." Rouge said in her normal sing-song merry and flirty manner. "Besides I'm sure Tails isn't homicidal, he sure is cute though!" rouge finished teasingly, satisfied at the look she received from Shadow at the remark.

"He will be after a few days of working with them!" Shadow grumped angrily.

"Situation does not compute, why does G.U.N. not utilise us for our combat capabilities?" Omega pointed out.

"Because tin-man, who would we fight." Rouge said, smacking the side of Omega playfully before continuing "like the job or not... these guys here pose the biggest threat to Mobius, so they're assigning the best to watch over them."

"Rouge is right, let's just go meet the inmates." Shadow said, before raising his hand revealing the green Chaos Emerald "This is taking too long! Chaos Control!"

The trio landed in a white room containing 5 generic cell doors (Metal with a bar window) two on each side of the walls while the last at the end of the wall. Shouts could be heard between Eggman and Fukurokov about who the greater scientist was, while Tails was saying a variety of pick up lines to Wave, who was a far away from the door as possible and clearly found the fox annoying.

Tails and Wave were in opposite cells from each other, Eggman was next to Wave, while Fukurokov was next to Eggman.

"How can you call yourself a great scientist Eggman? How many attempts have you made to take over the planet to be stopped by Sonic the hedgehog!" Fukurokov spat.

"Oh yeah Fukrokukov... Furkukov... Firqkov... bird brain! At least I never got my entire armada destroyed by that fox over there!" Eggman retaliated, Fukurokov fumed at this.

"Hey ho baby, foxy for the win!" Tails laughed with a cheesy smile on his face.

"Well at least it got blown up by a genius smarter then you Eggman! How come it never occurred to you to drop Sonic into a pool of water and seal it up?" Fukurokov laughed.

"Hear that Wave, I'm a genius!" Tails yelled.

"Shut up Tails, I'm not interested in you!" Wave yelled back.

"Awww come on!" Tails said, going puppy eyed.

"SHUT UP!" Shadow yelled, creating instant silence. "Good, now we've got you attention we're going to talk to you one by one, starting with you Wave."

"Sod off." Wave commented, still sulking in the back off her cell from Tails terrible attempt at pick up lines. Team dark ignored her remark and proceeded to walk to the front of her cell door as Rouge began flicking through a file.

"Wave Wave Wave... what are you in here for?" Rouge said silkily, grining at the swallow through the bars.

"Yeah Wave, tell the pretty lady what brings you to this neck of the woods?" Tails said, before Omega advanced on the kit and pointed a shoulder cannon at his forehead.

"You will be quiet while we interrogate the other prisoners!" Omega droned, making Tails gulp and retreat to his bunk. Wave smiled when he jumped on the bed, before answering.

"You know damn well why I'm here for, you've got the info in front of you... bat!" Wave grumped.

"Well if you want me to tell everybody, that's fine." Rouge commented happily before clearing her throat loudly. Fukurokov and Tails were instantly at their bars and listening in. "Wave the swallow, Babylonian rogue and notorious outlaw, captured three days ago trying to remove the world's largest diamond from a local museum after your GEAR took a bullet hit... and your teammates ditched you in order to avoid incarceration. Ouch girl!" Rouge happily stated, Wave just fumed in the back of her cell.

"Anything to say Wave?" Shadow asked.

"Those bastards are going to pay!" Wave said coldly.

"Yeah well ok then... moving onto Dr Eggman..." Shadow said happily as Team Dark approached his door. "So Eggman, what are you in for?" Shadow laughed, Eggman just growled angrily.

"Dr Eggman, blah blah blah... moron moron moron." Shadow said while flicking through the personality files. "Brought in a week ago after Sonic blew up your base and proceeded to force a struggling Knuckles to drag you here after he lost a bet with him..."

"I hate that hedgehog!" Eggman yelled. Fukurokov laughed heartily at this.

"Geeze Eggman, You're fatass made Knuckles struggle." Tails said laughing heavily again, before Omega proceeded to stare at the fox menacingly "Eeep!" Tails irises went big, Wave laughed at the display despite herself.

"Shut up Tails!" Eggman yelled again, putting Tails into another round of laughter.

Shadow and Rouge just shook their heads before moving on. Shadow flicked through the profiles again "Ok Dr Fu-q-kov..."

"Fukurokov!"

"Fuakuikov?" Shadow Tried.

"F-u-k-u-r-o-k-o-v!" Fukurokov spelled out angrily.

"Fuauikov" Omega said, scratching his head.

"Hey... I know, how about fuk-ur-a-dogov!" Wave said joining in, causing everyone except Dr Fukurokov and Omega to laugh.

"Hey I resent that statement..." Tails yelled happily "... nothing that stupid could be anywhere near the canine species!" This caused a fresh round of laughter from everyone, again excluding Omega and Dr Fukurokov."

Rouge was the first one to speak after the laughter died down. "So what are you in here for?"

"why don't you tell me!"

"Dr umm... however you say that... brought in five days ago, captured by G.U.N. agents after you sold dangerous robotic parts to an undercover agent... blah blah blah... this is quite easily the lamest excuse for being arrested in here!"

"Hey!" Dr Fukurokov yelled.

"Anything to say?"

"Selling micro quantum field reactors to dangerous groups is not boring!"

"Yeah... keep telling yourself that." Shadow commented.

"Ok now, Miles Prower..." Rouge said, walking over to his door while flicking through the profile files again "... AKA Tails the Fox, why are you in here?" Rouge asked, Tails rubbed the back of his neck for a second before answering.

"I took a wrong turn en-route to the pool." Tails laughed, cheesy grin present on his face.

"Miles Prower, brought in two days ago after you were caught setting off multiple napalm based explosive devices in a fireworks plant causing tens of millions in damages, several other charges currently processing including; several counts of tire slashing, several counts of vandalism, indecent exposure, underage drinking, drunk and disorderly conduct and finally... shoplifting." Rouge listed, laughter emanated through the cells again.

"OH HO HO HO, what a badass fox!" Eggman said with his trademark oversized comical grin.

"What? I was dared to." Tails stated, massive grin on his face.

"Ok, Ok..." Shadow started, now standing in the middle of the room "... you guys may be wondering why you were all brought here?"

"Why no... what makes you say that Shadow?" Dr Fukurokov asked, sarcasm dripping off every word. Shadow just ignored him and continued.

"G.U.N. has ordered that you spend the duration of your jail time doing something constructive..." Shadow continued before being interrupted by Eggman.

"Does it involve pie?" he said snidely, comical grin presenting itself again.

"Hey Eggman..." Wave yelled "... has anyone ever told you that you look like troll face when you do that?" both Tails and Wave burst out laughing at this, everyone else just looked at each other funny.

"What the hell is this 'troll face'?" Fukurokov asked.

"Troll face, processing..." Omega droned "...Internet meme, often used to portray when someone is bullshiting or being mischievous, or after someone posts inflammatory, extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community with the primary intent of provoking readers into an emotional response."

"Anyway..." Shadow continued "You'll be building G.U.N. a bunch of fancy new toys." He finished, as all the cell doors simutanisly slid open. Everyone exited their cells and saw Shadow pointing to the exit, outside was a closed room with assorted tools and parts everywhere.

"You make the inventions and G.U.N. will buy the designs off you by reducing your jail time, simple."

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	2. Omega: Examination

Omega: Examination.

Thanks to: 'Tails Is FLUFFY', 'A Ugly faic' and speedstriker34567 for their reviews.

Just a little side note, every chapter that has a name in it is taken solely from the characters POV.

Also, this story is supposed to be funny, but for this chapter it will be... not so funny, just to show the characters a bit.

Don't own any characters

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><p>So who's genius idea was this, sticking four of world's most dangerous criminals in one room and giving them free reign of tools and equipment for the purpose of doing what they do best?<p>

Okay, so let's start shall we? Dr Eggman: mechanical and programming genius, tried to take over the world hundreds of times, nearly succeeded on several occasions, and built the world's deadliest machine... me. Despises Tails, Dr Fukurokov, Shadow, Rouge and myself.

Dr Fukurokov: Yet another mechanical and programming genius, responsible for building the entire Battle Kukku Armada's fleet, could be considered more dangerous than Dr Eggman given the fact he is mentally insane. However he has a tendency to overlook the smallest things in plans. Despises Dr Eggman, Wave, Tails.

: It should be noted that him and Wave were once part of the Battle Kukku Army.

Tails the Fox: Mechanical and aerodynamic genius, although not technically evil Tails has the potential to be as dangerous or even more so out of everyone in the group, he has worked with the world famous 'Sonic the Hedgehog' on multiple occasions to save the world from evil doers and has a history with both Eggman and Fukurokov. He is a known Chaos user (Though, the extent is believed to be somewhat small) and has the ability to fly and attack violently with his twin tails. Tails has an extreme hormone imbalance that clouds his mind from proper thinking. Despises Dr Eggman and Dr Fukurokov.

: it should be noted that his hormone imbalance makes him susceptible to try out dangerous ideas for a simple laugh, his behaviour should also be monitored to make sure he doesn't attempt to rape Wave. (A.N. there will be no sex in this story!)

Wave the Swallow: Mechanical and G.E.A.R. genius, Wave is easily the world's best G.E.A.R. mechanic and is part (or was) of the Babylonian Rogues, Wave was once part of the Battle Kukku Army but was kicked out after she performed unauthorised repairs, she has openly stated once she gets out of here she will kill the other members of the Babylonian Rouges for leaving her. Despises Dr Fukurokov and Rouge. Potentially despises Tails as well.

: Wave is the most likely to attempt a solo escape from G.U.N. and should be watched carefully.

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	3. What the hell is a Russian?

What the hell is a Russian?

Thanks to BlissofanAngel and 'Tails Is FLUFFY' for reviewing the last chapter.

Don't own any characters, blah blah blah

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><p><strong>We join our hero's during a heated one-sided argument in the workshop, a shiny metal room with lots of cameras and benches. They are accompanied by the members of Team Dark, who are vigorously watching them.<strong>

"...I mean come on , they give us tools and any equipment we want and they don't expect us to 'break out' because we have better stuff to do? These guys are supposed to be protecting Mobius here!" Tails exclaimed angrily, slamming a screwdriver into a thick sheet of metal, piercing it.

"Yes, it is very suspect Tails..." Eggman commented "...but they are watching us 24/7, no doubt they have plenty of their so called _'scientists'_ making sure we don't build a bomb or something!"

"Well how the hell is that going to stop us!" Dr Fukurokov stated "We are smarter than any of them! We'll be outa here in no time!"

"If you guys were truly smart you wouldn't be talking about this in angry loud voices would you!" Wave pointed out smartly.

"Well what are they going to do?" Eggman started, smile present on his face while looking over at Team Dark "Lock us up! OH HO HO HO!"

"Hey Eggman, what are you building there?" Fukurokov asked.

"it's called an 'egg timer' Fukurokov, it times how long you've been cooking an egg for!" Eggman pointed out.

"Why the fuck are you making an egg timer for?" Wave said.

"Don't swear, bitch!" Tails said, before yelling at the cameras "Hey can I get another fucking screwdriver in here... and some more god-damn metal sheets!"

"Because Wave, the egg timers here don't explode, OH HO HO HO!" Eggman finished with a laugh, before Fukurokov decided to throw a wrench at said egg timer, causing it to explode and cover Eggman with soot and set his moustache alight. "Garggh! I'll get you for that fuck-ur-a-dog-off" Eggman yelled. Fukurokov just smiled and started to perform the Kozachok. (Russian step dance where they drop down and kick one of their legs out AKA the Russian squat-leg-kick dance.) "Oh yeah, I can do that too dog-off" Eggman commented, before proceeding to do the same.

"Think you guys are so top shit do ya?" Tails said before joining in "Just because ya got a Russian sounding name doesn't mean you can do the step dance, Fucks-cocks-off! And Eggman, you're a fat tub of lard, what the hell are you hoping to achieve?"

Wave turned around from her work and watched the three doing the dance, if every day was like this, she might come to enjoy the company. A new thought quickly came to her mind however, _"What the hell is a Russian?"_

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	4. Tails: Troll Car

Tails: Troll Car

Don't own any characters, herp a derpy derpy derpy fuck!

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><p>It was utterly confusing, everything Tails knew told him that this concept would not work.<p>

Tails was on a little known site called 'trollphysicscomic' (G.U.N. was actually stupid enough to give him access to the internet!) and had come across a picture of a troll driving a car. (well after clicking out of those fucking infuriating 'gum gum' ads, Tails made a mental note to kill whoever made gum gum.)

The only problem was this car was operated by a magnet hanging down from a pole, while a magnet hung off the front of the car, supposedly the magnets would pull on each other causing the car to move forward. But surely the two magnets would do the opposite and cancel each other out right...

Why do I feel the need to try this concept out? It won't work!

What if there was only one bigass magnet hanging off the pole? Metal objects on the floor move when a magnet passes over them, but this one would be connected! Would it still work?

Why am I still thinking this, it won't work, besides I got better stuff to do... like staring at Rouge's tits like I have been for the past ten minutes.

FUCK!

I began building a small scale model of the car, 'to my great surprise' it didn't work... that was a waste of time! Now where was I... where did she go?

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	5. Meet Warden Vector

Meet Warden Vector.

7hanks to BlissofanAngel for reviewing, and Dark Fox Tails for PM me a very funny idea, this is what he said:

Here's an idea for you to use if and when you bring in Dr Finitevus and Rotor in for the story?

Tails: "Hey Rotor, what were and Dr Finitevus charged with.

Rotor: "Indecent exposure?"

Dr Finitevus: "Same reason, fox boy!"

Tails: "Hey Rouge, how come Shadow isn't locked up for indecent exposure too,  
>in fact why not just round up a lot of the male andor female mobians for  
>wearing their birthday suits like lets say Knuckles for one."<p>

I'm not going to use this if I do bring these guys in, but I thought I'll put this here for you guys to laugh at.

Anyway, I'm starting a running joke, read to find out what it will be.

Don't own any characters *sobs*

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><p>(A.N. I'm starting to put dates on here.)<p>

(Day Four, 12:00PM, in Abraham Towers office.)

"So... are you ready for this job Vector?" said a man in a gray army uniform, decorated with dozens of army ribbons and badges.

"You bet Commander Tower... I'll make sure no-one escapes from Prison Island." Vector replied eagerly.

"Good... now sign this and Shadow here will show you to the inmates." Abraham Tower said, bringing a piece of paper out from his table. Vector was an experienced detective and knew the importance of reading any contract.

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><p><em>I ... hereby confirm my application to the position of specialist G.U.N. warden. (Prison Island, scientific block.)<em>

_I ... hereby confirm that I understand and comprehend the conditions of work, no responsibility will be taken by G.U.N. for any harm or untimely demise befallen me by an inmate._

_This contract can be voided at any time, given a new warden has been located and is ready to be employed. _

_Signed employee ..._

_Signed employer ..._

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><p>"This has got to be the worst work contact I've ever seen!" Vector exclaimed.<p>

"Well, our lawyers told us to keep it short"

(Day Four, 12:20PM In the prison cells.)

"SHUT UP!" Shadow shouted, to no effect. The inmates had grown used to his unique way of controlling them after three days. (Well, his attempts anyway.)

"You sure you don't want to try _'fox style'_ Wave?" Tails asked kinkily.

"Hey Eggman, why don't you try to remove your cell door again with another one of those shitty egg timers! Ha ha ha!" Fukurokov asked.

"Tails, you would of had a chance at me if you weren't such an inappropriate dick!" Wave shouted.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Shadow shouted.

"Hey Fucks-cock-off, what have you done so far to escape? Last time I checked..." Eggman retorted before being interrupted.

"GUYS, SHUT THE HELL UP RIGHT THE FUCK NOW OR I'LL MAKE YOU WASH YOUR OWN SHIT-CAN WITH YOUR OWN FUCKING TONGUES!" Shadow snapped, this time silence was drawn, before Wave commented.

"Hey, you may want to punish Tails a bit more, see him being part of the canine species he normally washes his own ass with his tongue anyway so... ummm yeah." Everyone (excluding Shadow) laughed at this.

"This here..." Shadow stopped to point at Vector "...Is your new prison warden, Vector. His job is to make sure you guys don't break out and to also generally be an asshole!"

"Hi there Vector!" Fukurokov said childishly, waving through the cell door, Vector returned the gesture by giving the bird 'the bird'.

"Well, now I've seen you lot, I'm going to explore the base some more, so ta ta!" Vector said happily. Before leaving Vector continued. "Have fun in your cells!" Vector pressed a button and the doors were closed.

"Wow, that guy is an asshole, he didn't even stop to say hello!" Eggman yelled through the bars.

"Hey, I say we teach that croc a lesson!" Fukurokov said. Tails ears picked up at this but he didn't say anything.

"Yeah, I agree, plus it might be kinda fun!" Wave said, walking over to her cell door.

"I say we make it into a game..." Eggman said, finger to his lips "... first one to pull one over on the warden without getting caught wins!" everyone stated their agreement to this.

Behind his door, Tails had a grin on his face. _"These guys could be fun after all!" _

Behind his door, Dr Fukurokov had a grin on his face. _"Excellent, these guys could help me get out of here!" _

Behind his door, Dr Eggman had a grin on his face. _"Perfect, these guys would be excellent allies to the Eggman Empire!" _

Behind her door, Wave had a grin on her face. _"Finally, a reliable team! Against the odds, we fit together!"_

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><p>Alright, you know the drill, Reviews = shiny new updates.<p> 


	6. Fukurokov: Thoughts of a madbird

Fukurokov: Thoughts of a madbird

Thanks to Tails is FLUFFY for reviewing.

Don't own any characters, which would constitute slavery.

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><p>The others in the room aren't so bad, really.<p>

Their fucking unbearable!

Eggman is a fucking idiot, Wave is an untrustworthy shit and Tails is an unpredictable dick!

Shadow thinks he's so top shit, Rouge is a total slut, Omega is a malfunctioning tin man and Vector... Don't get me started on Vector!

_Why not? _

Vector is an ass!

_Because? _

Here I go having a conversation with myself again!

_Is the company so bad? _

Shut up!

_I'm just surprised no one's mentioned the eyes yet. _

Doesn't matter, once I get out of here.

_Why aren't you out already?_

You are my brain, figure it out you stupid fuck!

_Did you just call yourself a stupid fuck? _

No I called you a stupid fuck!

_Same thing. _

Although the others might become useful, even bearable given time, I'll have to keep an eye on them to see how trustworthy they are.

_What makes you think they would want to side with depressed, __schizophrenic__ fuck like you?_

I hate you!

_I am you! _

No, you're an asshole.

_That makes you an asshole! _

I'm blocking you out!

_..._

He has a point, why would they want to side with me?

Eggman actually considers himself my equal, and given his egomaniacal ways he's not going to give that argument up.

_Complement him, but never say he's better then you._

Wave is an arrogant bitch, sure she's bearable, but I can't trust her after I caught her trying to repair my flagships engines without permission.

_Is that really so bad? She's a good mechanic __and was__sided __with the Battlebird Armada at the time._

Tails like I said, is an uncontrollable hormonal dick.

_Your just mad because he destroyed your entire fleet, controlling him will probably be easy, give him something fun to do, I.E. your dirty work. _

"Hey Fukurokov..." Tails said.

He said it right!

"... Pass me your spanner could you!"

"Sure, alright."

_The fox respects you, though he won't say it._

I'm not going to force him do my dirty work!

_But he's useful! _

Exactly.

_He's a goody good, if he's not blinded by his own balls, blowing stuff up, he's going to be trying to stop you._

Then I'll stop him.

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><p>Rate and review... You!<p> 


	7. Meeting Captain Tower

Meeting captain Tower.

7hanks to BlissofanAngel, DaddlerTheDalek and ' ' for reviewing... honestly someone posted a review as a simple space for their name... tsk tsk tsk.

Don't own any characters.

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><p><strong>We join our hero's (and Team Dark along with that asshole Vector) in captain Towers office at the upper complex of Prison Island.<strong>

"So Shadow, please inform me as to how this could have happened?" Abraham Tower asked _ever so politely. _

"Umm... I really couldn't comment on that..." Shadow said, rather uncomfortably.

"How about you Vector?"

"Team Dark was supposed to be watching them..."

"You're their warden Vector!" Shadow retorted; the prisoners watched the unfolding events with glee.

"So... you're the guards assigned to watch over them!" Vector shot back.

"Hey, if you recall you gave us the day off today!" Rouge counted.

"System databanks show no guards on duty for the prisoners today!" Omega droned, making Vector sweat-drop.

"So Vector... this is your fault!" Tower commented, pointing out the window.

"Well... ah... technically that was the _prisoners _fault... umm captain Tower sir"

"hmmm... get the hell outa my office, and if you fuck up like this again your fired." Tower commanded, Vector didn't need anymore telling and was out of the office at speed, leaving Team Dark and the prisoners to face Tower's treatment.

"Ciao asshole!" Wave shouted after Vector, making Eggman do his trademark laugh, Tails had his normal cheesy grin pasted on his face while Fukurokov was shaking furiously. Tower turned his angry scowl to them next.

"So which one of you can tell me why there is a **one hundred and twenty foot mech towering out of the top of Prison Island!**" Tower yelled, pointing outside of the window again for good measure.

Every thought going through the prisoners brains were "Next time we're getting Vector fired!"

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	8. Piss

Piss

7anks to Strate , Tails Is FLUFFY, BlissofanAngel and DaddlerTheDalek for reviewing.

By the way, I'm gona say this now, expect personality changes for Omega.

Don't own any characters, blah blah blah, yarda yarda yarda.

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><p><strong>We join our hero's inside of Prison Island, that asshole Vector had decided to make our unfortunate and undeserving hero's clean up the rubble of a strange one hundred and twenty foot mech that appeared out of the roof suddenly and unexpectedly and which had nothing whatsoever to do with our hero's.<strong>

**The reason this mech was a pile of burning smouldering slag was of course, the fact that the asshole Vector made poor unfortunate and undeserving Team Dark blow it up after it appeared suddenly and unexpectedly out of the roof of Prison Island. **

"Hey Fukurokov, next time don't forget something as elementary as aligning the plutonium generator to the main engines!" Eggman criticised loudly.

"Hey Eggman, next time don't design the mech to look exactly like you and make me have to climb into its ass to align aforementioned plutonium generator!" Fukurokov shot back angrily.

"OH HO HO HO HO!" Eggman laughed, in case you didn't know that's how he laughed.

"_And just like that these guys are gay and unentertaining again!" _Wave thought while looking around _"Wait a minute!" _

"Where the hell is Tails?" everyone looked around at Wave's revelation, finding an absence of fox.

"Oh shit!" Shadow yelled before pointing out the obvious "There's a hole in the roof!"

Both Fukurokov and Wave looked at each other, before flying out the roof with Eggman's angry shouts below them.

"Come back here you backstabbing cunts!"

"Omega, Rouge, after them!" Shadow ordered angrily after throwing several Chaos Spears in the direction of the escapees, both robot and bat blasted of instantly.

"Hey... wadda I miss?" Tails asked whilst zipping up his fur.

"Where the fuck were you!" Shadow demanded angrily! So much so an exclamation mark was needed outside of dialog.

"Taking a piss behind that wall." Tails replied simply, pointing to said wall.

Shadow sweat-dropped and fell over backwards.

Seconds later Fukurokov and Wave both fell face first into the dirt in front of Shadow, burning blackened feathers trailing after them.

"OH HO HO HO HO... Nice escape you two!"

"Oh Yeah..." Omega sang, proceeding to do the robot "...Go the Tin Man, Go the Tin man... Aurp! Aurp!" Omega finished, flinging his hands into the air like he was in a 80s dance club.

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	9. Egged

Egged.

Thanks 2 'Tails Is FLUFFY', DaddlerTheDalek and Sparkling-nexis137 for reviewing.

Don't own any characters.

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><p>(Day six, 1:00 pm, destroyed mech site.)<p>

Shadow briefly looked at the blackened and charred forms of Wave and Fukurokov, with the still dancing Omega above them both.

This had to stop, Vector would have sent the prisoners in here even if Team Dark wasn't around, and sooner or later (with these guys being geniuses it would probably be 'later') they would have figured they could just fly out. (With the exception of Eggman of course.)

It had been on his mind for two days now, and he couldn't believe he was about to say this. It went against every moral fibre in his body, honestly he was enjoying the (relative) peace he was getting from not having to fight anybody.

"Can you guys get that asshole Vector fired?"

Both birds pulled their heads out of the dirt, Eggman face morphed into that of a troll-face suddenly and Tails looked up from what he was focusing on. (Wave's bent-over ass.)

"Sure, what do you think we were doing?" Eggman questioned.

"Just... don't get us involved!" Shadow growled before sending them off to the cells.

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><p>(Day seven, Vectors quarters.)<p>

Vector awoke with a start, he had a sneaking suspicion today wasn't going to be a good day.

Glancing over to his clock, he saw it was early in the morning, 11:30 to be precise.

Sighing because Vector was a fat sack of lazy crap, he got up _slowly _and walked over to the kitchen area.

Grabbing an egg box from the fridge, he proceeded over to the stove and started bringing a pan to the boil for some poached eggs.

Vector stood there with his mouth was agape and one eye was twitching for a full five minutes as the pan slowly heated up, waiting for cognitive thought to return to him.

Glancing down, vector saw the pan was boiling by now, opening the egg box and retrieving an egg he attempted to crack it against the pans edge, only for the egg to put a clear dint in it.

"Huh!" Vector exclaimed stupidly, he brought the egg up to his eyes so he could inspect it.

"Heh... Must be getting stronger..." Vector said to himself, attempting to brake the egg again, Vector was dismayed to see the pan had received another dent into it.

Being the idiot he was, Vector brought the pan to his eyes level this time, effectively pouring the boiling hot water on his face. "FUCK!" Vector screamed loudly, "STUPID FUCKING PAN!" Vector continued on, bringing the offending item down hard on the stove, only for it to bounce back up and hit him hard in the snout and send him to the floor.

Groaning loudly while holding the side of his head, Vector momentarily looked around. A strange ticking sound could be heard.

Spying the egg from before lying on the ground, Vector picked it up and examined it again, it took him a full ten seconds to realise the ticking sound was coming from the egg, a further ten seconds to realise the egg was made out of metal, a further ten seconds to put two and two together. "Oh! Shi..."


	10. Vector gets Fired

Fired.

Thanks to BlissofanAngel, Sparkling-nexis137, 'Dingo 57' and 'Tails Is FLUFFY' for reviewing.

Don't own any characters, blah blah blah.

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><p><strong>(Day 7, 11:00, before the egg fiasco, in the workshop.)<strong>

"Hey 'Fuck ur a dog', you done over there yet?" Wave asked politely, turning from her own work to look at the crazed bird. He was hunched over a work table and his work was hidden from Wave's sight.

"Yeah... Hmprrrmmmph... Hold on a minute!" Fukurokov replied, bringing out a screwdriver for a second, heavy sparks could be seen bouncing off the side of the table and it sounded like a blowtorch was active, strangely the blowtorch was over at the other end of the room.

"I still don't see how this improves our chances though!" Tails stated his objection. Both birds turned to look at them.

"Why the hell do you care! I would think this was rights up your alley?" Fukurokov asked.

"I'm sure giving the commander the personality 'sort of, kinda like Dr Evil' isn't the greatest idea ever."

"Tails has a point... but it will still be funny to see the repercussions from this." Eggman stated, Tails seemed to agree with this and nodded his approval. Both Tails and Eggman were chillaxing on a white couch while sipping hot beverages.

"That's why we built the safeguard" Wave said. "When and how do we get the hat on him?"

"We could get my 'party animals' to put it on him tonight." Tails suggested, placing quote fingers around the words 'party animals.'

"No... Somehow I don't see that one working out for us." Fukurokov stated simply.

"We could use the same robots from when we replaced Vector's eggs!" Eggman said. The heroes looked at each other approvingly at this and Wave went off to construct the mind control hat.

"Hey... Tittys!" Tails called out, earning him a smirk from Rouge at the opposite end of the room. "Get over here we got a job for you!"

"What do you want! _Cutie!_" Rouge said as she flew over all slut like.

"We need you to shove a few robots through Towers door." Eggman told Rouge, earning him a smack from Tails.

"Since when were you called Cutie? Eggman!" Tails asked.

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><p><strong>Somewhat later, after that asshole Vectors shift.<strong>

**(Day 7, 10:00pm, Vectors quarters.)**

Vector slumped back into his room, today had not been a good day and those prisoners were going to pay tomorrow.

He woke up to exploding eggs, literally, that had Eggman's fingerprints all over. Secondly he was chased down the hallway by miniature metal planes that shot lasers at him, suddenly disappearing into nothingness when he called the guards, somehow he suspected that Wave was behind this one.

He just hoped Fru-ku-kov and Tails didn't try anything.

"_Man, I can't even think-pronounce that name!" _Vector thought, which a rare occurrence for the croc. Thankfully for Vector, his thoughts were interrupted by a knocking at the door, so Vector went and opened it angrily.

"Yeah... wadda you wa... WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!" Vector screamed, outside his door was 14 prostitutes in revealing clothing, one or two smoking a cigarette.

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><p>"Wonder how it's going?" Eggman asked, the hero's were still in the workshop building assorted world domination machines. His question was answered for him when a faint "TAILS!" was heard echoing down the hallway.<p>

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><p><strong>Five minutes later.<strong>

"Yeah baby yeah!" Vector exclaimed, smacking one of the whores ass while they all did the congo.

"Hello Vector!" Tower said, finger in his mouth. Tower was wearing a baseball cap that had the word 'EVIL' etched on the front of it.

"_Oh Shit!" _ Vector thought, earning him a migraine from having more than three thoughts today. "Ummm... Hi Commander Tower!" Vector said

"Please Vector, call me... Commander Evil!" Evil said, lightning sparked up behind him as a gruff weasel pulled a giant Tesla Coil behind him.

"Ummm... Ok!"

"What do you think you're doing!" Evil questioned politely, his eyes started darting around the room and scanned each and every hooker.

"Ummm... Tails musta called all these hookers here..." Vector said, getting interrupted by Evil.

"Hmmm... I'm gona call bullshit on that one Vector!" Commander evil said politely. "See... I think you called all these hookers here... No offence ladys..." Evil started, the assorted hookers started giggling when he said this "...and you forgot to invite me to your little sex orgy congo line!" he finished, finger in his mouth again.

"No No NO NO..."

"You know Vector... When I said I was going to 'fire you' next time you fucked up... I kinda meant I was going to send you into the incinerator!"

"You wouldn't"

"Oh yes I would Vector!" Evil confirmed, as two robot guards came into the room and dragged him off.

"NOOOOOOOOO!" Vector screamed, clawing at the door on the way out.

"Ta Ta!" Evil exclaimed sarcastically, turning to the hookers after the door shut. "And how are you lovely ladies going tonight?"

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><p>Rate and Review... YOU!<p> 


	11. Return of the king baby

Thought I was dead, did ye? A relatively small one (just like your penis) to hopefully revive the series.

7hanks to 'Tails Is FLUFFY' DaddlerTheDalek and Paladin101 for reviewing last chapter.

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><p><strong>'Caution, lemon alert!'<strong>

"Go on, are you going to put it in there?"

"Hold on, I'm getting there you stupid bird!"

"It's not that hard Tails!"

"Exactly... bitch!"

"Hmmmm... let me try!" Wave stated, grabbing the object in question and lapping at it lovingly.

"Awwww... Wave!"

"Give me more Tails!" Wave exclaimed, Tails happily replied by taking the cup and refilling it with some more 'Pirate did ye' expect dat's sour as all fuckery brand lemon juice.'

"How the hell can you drink that!" Tails asked, eyeing her curiously.

"Well considering I have a beak, I have to use my tongue..."

"That's not what I meant."

"I know." Wave stated, shaking her shoulders before filling up the cup and handing it to him indifferently, "besides... why can't you drink it?"

"Because that stuff tastes like shit!" Tails stated.

"Come on Tails! I dare you!" Wave challenged, exploiting the fox's known weakness with the word 'dare.' Tails eyed the cup suspiciously for less than two seconds.

"God damn it!" he shouted, before downing the glass in an instant.

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><p>"So what makes you think you'll be a good... 'candidate'." Commander Evil asked, putting quotation marks around the word 'candidate.' The green hedgehog across from him shock his arms impassively before replying.<p>

"Cos I'm the greatest baby! Plain and simple."

"Stuck up power hungry dick..." Commander Evil said out loud, writing some notes down on some paper, "narcistic fuckwit... greedy selfish jerk... E-V-I-L!" He said, exclaiming the last part, "You've got the job Scourge!"

"Oh yeah... return of the king baby!" Scourge stated getting up, "When do I start." he asked hopefully, he was looking forward to torturing some prisoners.

"Right after you clean up Mr Bigglesworth's litter box!"

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><p>Rate and Review... You!<p> 


	12. bigass update

Problem interweb fags?

Expected an update did we?

Update tomorrow... sometime whenever. Chap size will probably be small (like your penis), no idea what I'm going to write about... but anywhore.

Pretty much I did this to inform you ahead of time that I will infact, be taking care of this story... and to troll you... that may of been a major factor in this particular chapter.

Currently looking for work opportunities and such, so storytelling time is limited I'm afraid.

P.S. changing rating to M, since there is a shit ton of vulgarity's in here...

Oh, I know, bad language...

Our hero's will be discussing the complexities of filthy language, and how it affects delicate little minds like yours... oh, I wonder how that will go down?

(no shit, I just came up with that when I was writing this.)

P.S. I did have an trollface ascii inserted at the top here, but FF decided to be a trolling bastard and not accept it.


	13. Internet safety and usage of the F word

"Ok reader or readet, today we have a super sonic special, just like in the comics!" Eggman stated, leaning back on a 'eggcliner' while sipping eggnog. "it will be filled with filthy ass language, so if you're underage please fuck off." Eggman continued.

"Yes, you see the author is a bit of a fuck head at the moment after eating some strange cheese left over in the freezer." Scourge stated, leaning back in his wardens chair in a completely different room.

"This chapter has nothing to do with the story in general, more or less you should consider it a lesson to your small ass brains." Wave stated.

"More or less, these lessons should not be listened to." Tails stated.

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><p>"Ok, lesson one." Fukukokukoukooukv? stated, "The f word, or more commonly known as fuck."<p>

"This word is appropriate for most every occasion, from baby I want to fuck you, you're a fuck head, to fuck you... you stupid ass fuck." Scourge stated gleefully, "this is fun!" he exclaimed.

"on FanFiction, it should be sounded when you see a yaio fic, as in, 'oh fuck, now that's something I want to see'." Wave stated, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"fuck should also be used when you open a fic and view this shit." Tails stated, VV pointing down VV

Yay! Sonic said we saved the day and everybody chaired 4 them. Oh gawd sonic plese i'm preggo with yo babys amy said. I can't find that dam 4th chaos emerad shadow said as he burst tho the wall and killed some1. What your preggo with my babys, sonic said. Yes I am amy said as she held he sumtic

^^ "This should also be accompanied with shit and god damn it." Fukukuakovov? Stated. ^^

"no one wants to read this kind of shit, so if you write like that, get the fuck out." Tails stated, "and if you've ever tried to spell Fukurokov, fuck should also accompany it in some way or another."

"indeed." Frukuaqrokov? Stated, "I myself have trouble with it."

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><p>"Lesson two!" Eggman stated, who was now wearing the teacher's robes from Sonic X (you know exactly what I'm talking about!) "internet lies."<p>

"You are probably internet lying right now and haven't even realised it, I'm sure you're not over 18 years of age are you, yet this is an 'M' rated fic." Furiianjrnijnainebiuhabiuheu? Stated. "well done you evil thing."

"Oh my, it appears I'm the millionth viewer to this webpage!" Scourge stated, "click here to claim your virus it says."

"I have read and agree to the terms of service." Knuckles said, appearing suddenly from a cloud of Jamaican smoke. "nuff said." He gruffed, smashing through the wall and walking out.

"Yes, that is my picture!" Eggman stated, holding up an image of Barney the dinosaur to several preschoolers whilst at the same time grooming his stach.

"Going onto Facebook and saying 'happy birthday, hope you have a great day.'" Tails said.

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><p>"Lesson three! Females on the internet."<p>

"..."

"Wave! Get back in the kitchen where you belong!" everyone yelled.

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><p>Rate, fav, subscribe, review.<p>

P.S. yeah, my writing isn't exactly perfect either but at least I manage to make it legible.

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><p>"Scourge, Where the hell is commander Evil?" Tails asked.<p>

"On a boat in the middle of the sea, he said something about education... I don't know." He replied.


	14. Robotic Soul

7hanks to HeartlessDemonWolf and overlordrsh for reviewing the last chap

may look a little different from the other chaps, but I assure you the next one should (should) be funny.

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><p>"Well I'm in Japanese prison lawd..." Tails said, blowing <em>"der de, dur der"<em> into a harmonica "Japanese prison got me down..." Tails said, again blowing _"der de, dur der"_ into the harmonica. "said I'm here in Japanese prison lawd..." _"der de, dur der"_ "don't belong here, my eyes are round." _"der de, dur der" _"even though I'm of Japanese creation..."_ "der de, dur der" _"and my eyes are fucking huge."

"SHUT UP FOXBOY!" Eggman yelled, to the general approval of everyone in Prison Island.

"You just jelly." Tails said, poking his tongue out at Eggman.

Wave sighed angrily in her cell, every night was like this. Every... fucking... night... Tails would piss everyone off in one way or another; Team Dark was no help either, just sniggering at the _'creative'_ remarks shot back and forth between the boys... in fact, most of the time they were jumping in at opportune times to cause more verbal carnage.

Currently, Omega was asking Eggman what the significance of life was in a childlike manner, which was causing Eggman to, well... as Shadow says, "flip out the raging pile of steaming ape shit."

"WHAT IN THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BY THAT! YOU'RE A MACHINE!" Eggman screamed angrily, pulling on his moustache.

"Do I have a soul Dr Eggman sir?" Omega asked cutely... well, as cute as a four foot eleven inch death machine that's armed to the metaphorical teeth and currently suffering from an acute case of bi polar can be. "You giant hulking fat-ass meatbag!"

"AUGGARGUARGH!" Eggman screamed angrily. "I'LL GET YOU FOR THAT OMEGA!"

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><p>Next chapter... "Doctor" Evil.<p> 


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